Pope Idol

It seems the pontiff is finally ready to meet his maker (boy is he going to be surprised) and it's time to look for a successor. And what better way in this modern day world of reality television than an embarrassing popularity contest.
The panel could be made up of Simon Cowell, George "God is on my side" Bush and the bloke who played the priest in the Exorcist, with Catholics voting one candidate off the list each week.