Titan Magazines 2005 Awards

Another tough year at the coal face (when I say tough year I mean frustrating year and when I say coal face I mean desk).

In honour of all the magazine editors' hard work throughout the year we had our own Xmas night out (sorry management types, but we wanted to relax in our own company). And because I'm a massive showoff I decided to put together some awards. You know the kind - the sort of funny/borderline abusive things people would display with pride/bin out of disgust.

So without further ado, the winners were...


Best Tea 2005
Nominees were judged on speed, quality, warmth, amount of tea made and the level of tea dance excitement shown in Sharon and Kate’s tea dances. The winner lost points for speed ("Oh yeah, I was making tea wasn't I") but made up for it in quality and quantity.
Winner: Paul Terry

The Chicken Little Award for the Sky Falling In
Honourable mention: Richard Mathews for a nightmare project that somehow became a magazine and made it to the newstands.
But for dealing with a project that was so bad she was willing to quit, and for spending a large part of the year homeless after rental properties kept falling through, there was a clear favourite!
Winner: Sharon Gosling

The Methuselah Long Service Award (Sponsored by the Monday Media Guardian)
Once Darryl and Brian had been eliminated from the running, there was only going to be one winner of this award. He is happily stuck in his well-trodden rut and unwilling to give up the chair he’s spent almost the last 10 years working a comfortable arse-groove into.
Winner: Martin Eden

The Paul Terry Award for Relationship Crisis
Honourable mention: Not that we actually did give an honourable mention, as this relationship drama was a little too fresh - but it would have been Natalie Clubb.
Besides, I know what you’re thinking. This award literally had Paul Terry’s name written all over it (it was a Terry's Chocolate Orange). And in the same way that Dakota Fanning won The Dakota Fanning Award for Best Child Performance in Total Film, the award's namesake had to tap and unwrap.
Winner: Paul Terry

Hi-de-Hi Red Coat Award for Staff Morale
Honourable mention: Ned Hartley - although again we forgot to namecheck this honourable mention (the wine had been flowing well at that point), Ned should be applauded for his efforts to ressurect the 2nd floor lunchtime drink.
However, this award went to the bubbliest member of staff, always willing to see the good in things and try to help, always willing to risk life and liver by leading the charge to the pub.
Winner: Kate Lloyd

Biggest Promotion
Since all those people who made it to the rank of senior editor don't officially start until the New Year, we had to discount them. Besides, their promotion was only a short leap in comparison to the winner of this award. He was the lowest of the low, the commoner you’d throw into a puddle to save decent folk getting their feet wet, the person whose job title ranged from “teaboy” to “Office Bitch” depending on who you asked. But he's now a deputy editor and you will call him sir.
Winner: Ned Hartley

Titan Magazines' Editor of the Year
And so to the big one, an award that was sweeter to win because it was voted for by your peers. There were many reasons to vote for Titan Magazines' Editor of the Year. Did you think they had done the best work?; had they served the magazine department the best?; were you in their clique and had to vote for them or risk being cast out into solitude with the rest of us? (there went my award); had they consistently turned out a high-quality product with no fuss?
The voting was tense - if only because a few people took offence to the whole thing and refused to vote. But in the end it was a very popular win for the editor of Charmed Magazine.
Winner: Kate Lloyd