My name is Matt

Last night I made a young man very happy. No not like that!

For some reason I waited until 9.30pm when it had gone dark to go and draw £200 out of the cashpoint in Walthamstow. Perhaps I’ve got a subconscious death wish. Or maybe I’m just not used to leaving the house on weekends – it’s scary the amount of Monday mornings that I realise I haven’t been outside since I got home Friday night.

Already feeling a little nervous, I was slightly more freaked out when a mobile phone started ringing as I went past Walthamstow Library. It was just sitting on the wall, in the sort of spot where teenagers would hang out. I looked around to see if anyone was going to lay claim to it. My first thought sums up the naff nature of TV these days as I actually wondered if this was some kind of filmed prank.

Unfortunately, the phone rang off before I could answer it. So I stuck it in my pocket and headed to the cashpoint. Thankfully, I was able to extract funds without being mugged – the Daily Mail would be amazed! On the way back, just as I had passed the same spot at the library, it rang again.

"Hello. This is an odd question, but do you know who you’re ringing?"

"Yeah, this is my phone."

"Ahh, excellent. Are you still in Walthamstow? You left it on the wall next to the library. I’ll head back there and wait next to the toilets if you want to pick it up."

The next thing that went through my head was 'And so it was your Honour that I met the young man at the public toilets in Walthamstow...'

He showed up, looking a bit embarrassed for having left his phone in the first place. I hadn’t had a shave and there was a moment where he looked at me like I was a tramp who might want some kind of reward. But the lack of slurred speech as I handed it over and said "Here you go" and waived away his thanks with "No worries" probably helped and off he cycled.

I like to think that’s a little bit of Karma in the bank. I’m just trying to be a better person. My name is Matt.